We are all shaped by the families and environments we grew up in. These influences—what we absorb as children—often become the blueprint for our lives, guiding how we think, feel, and act. But while much attention is given to the traits and behaviours we want to change or leave behind, it’s equally important to focus on the strengths we’ve inherited and how we can own them as part of our personal identity.
Family Imprints: What Are They?
Family imprints are the beliefs, habits, and traits we inherit from our upbringing. They can be positive or negative, conscious or unconscious. While we often strive to distance ourselves from certain aspects of our past, we rarely stop to celebrate the strengths we’ve absorbed—what can be called our “inherited assets.”
These assets might include resilience, creativity, humour, or empathy—qualities we’ve observed in our parents, caregivers, or other influential figures. By acknowledging these strengths, we can transform them from unconscious gifts into deliberate tools for navigating life.
Turning Inherited Strengths Into Personal Strengths
In coaching, a decisive shift occurs when we help clients recognize and take ownership of their inherited strengths. It’s not just about acknowledging what they’re good at but truly integrating these strengths into their sense of self. This process involves:
Identifying Strengths-Encourage clients to create a strengths list. This could include traits they excel in or qualities they’re praised for. Often, these strengths feel “easy” to them, so they might overlook them.
Tracing Their Origins- Ask questions like, “Is your mother or father like this? Where do you think this strength comes from?” By exploring the source, clients gain clarity on which strengths are inherited.
Choosing to Own Strengths- Help clients move beyond seeing these traits as passive inheritances. Encourage them to choose these strengths as part of their identity actively. For instance, resilience might have been passed down through generations, but owning it means consciously applying it to their challenges.
The Power of Strength-Based Coaching
Positive psychology research highlights the transformative effect of focusing on strengths. When clients recognise and cultivate their strengths, they experience greater confidence, resilience, and capacity to face life’s challenges. This strength-based approach shifts the focus from fixing what’s wrong to amplifying what’s already correct.
For example, when a client demonstrates empathy effortlessly, pointing out that this isn’t a universal skill can be eye-opening. Helping them own this strength might involve asking:
“Are you aware of how rare this skill is?”
“Is this something you’ve cultivated, or does it come naturally?”
“How can you integrate this strength more intentionally into your life?”
Strengths as a Path to Empowerment
By owning their strengths, clients become more complete and empowered. They begin to see their strengths as part of their identity—not just inherited traits but deliberate choices. This integration allows them to use their strengths more intentionally in daily life, leading to greater fulfilment and presence.
Final Thoughts
Family imprints aren’t just about the challenges we face or the behaviours we want to unlearn. They are also about the treasures we’ve inherited—gifts we can claim and use to build a stronger, more authentic self.
When coaching, take the time to explore these inherited strengths. Help clients identify, own, and integrate them into their lives. By doing so, you’re not just helping them recognize what’s already good—you’re empowering them to become the best version of themselves.
So, give it a try. Start a conversation about inherited strengths with your clients and watch as they uncover new layers of confidence and potential.
